"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."
William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.""That depends, sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
I'm not posh - I'm just jolly good at polo.
It's that age old question:How old are you?
After a row my wife sent me a text to say I was very condescending.To be honest I was surprised she could spell it.
The definition of irony:Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia - fear of long words. jfgi.
I had to google "jfgi" to see what it meant.The irony is overwhelming.
My wife says that I never solve my own problems.How do I prove her wrong?
My best friend came up to me yesterday and said, "This is a photo of me when I was younger."I replied, "Every photo is of when you were younger."
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