Being exposed to thermonuclear

Being exposed to thermonuclear radiation at high stratospheric altitudes with low air pressure and inadequate personal safety attire really makes my blood boil.

Never judge someone until

"Never judge someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes."
Unless their shoes are Crocs.

Nervous about your first

Nervous about your first ever porn shoot?
Just imagine everyone naked.

My Grandad always used to say

My Grandad always used to say "find a penny, pick it up, and all day long you'll have good luck."
Which worked well for him, until he drowned in a fountain.

I remember the shouts of

I remember the shouts of "SCAB!" as my father went to work during the great dermatologists strike.

My Dad used to say

My Dad used to say: 'Always fight fire with fire'

- and that's why he was thrown out of the fire brigade.

My gran always used to say

My gran always used to say that, "No news is good news."
No surprise that she was soon sacked from her job as a journalist.

We all know what sesame seeds

We all know what sesame seeds are. But just what is a sesame?

Return flights.

Return flights.
They take me back.

They say what you don't know

They say what you don't know, can't hurt you.
Apparently not so true in the Bomb Disposal Squad.

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