foshy.co.uk

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Dad jokes - 28.01.2021

   humour

Here's my collection of very dubious jokes. It's getting quite long now, take a look below the fold:

Just been assaulted in a health food shop! Someone threw a massive bottle of cod liver oil tablets at me.
Fortunately it's only super fish oil injuries

When one door opens another one closes. Other than that it's a pretty good car.

I used to work at a cats home, but I had to leave. They kept reducing meowers.

I just got some anti gloating cream. I can't wait to rub it in.

Nits are a terrible problem. You'd think people could get their heads together and come up with a solution.

My girlfriend just left me. She says my life revolves around football and she's sick of it.
I'm quite upset. We were together for five seasons.

I got caught stealing full stops...
I'm looking at a lengthy sentence.

I think my wife is covering my rifle collection with glue. She's denying it, but I'm sticking to my guns.

"I'm arresting you for downloading all of Wikipedia."
"Wait! I can explain everything!"

I hope that after I die, people will say: "He certainly owed me a lot of money!"

Continue Reading...


Processing patterns - 05.03.2021

   processing

Lovely graphics, shamelessly stolen from TyYann


Crocus - 26.02.2021

   photo

crocus


Earworms - 13.12.2020

   music

Studies show that 98% of us experience earworms. I've noticed that mine often occur when outside on two feet. There doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason reason to the tunes which pop into my head, they seem almost completely random.

I'm keeping a record:
(Updated - 21.02.2021)


Harmonograph - 16.02.2021

   processing

Harmonograph
The Victorians were really keen on harmonographs but today we can create the patterns without going to the workshop.